The Thanksgiving Conversation Piece: Read This, Thank Us Later

 Guernica by Pablo Picasso. Photo credit: wikipictures

Guernica by Pablo Picasso. Photo credit: wikipictures

Oh, to give thanks. To be grateful… for the people you have chosen to surround yourself with for one, maybe two (but certainly no more than three) days of the year. With today’s family dynamics, it’s just not as simple as it used to be. Now, that’s not to say the old way was better; there was a lot of passive aggression and people not getting things out on the table (perhaps literally) that they should have. During the “eras of innocence” like that of The Greatest Generation, sharing our true feelings and expressing any degree of passion about something was generally frowned upon. Unless you were breaking bread with folks like Frida Kahlo and her communist-minded revolutionary friends where zeal is welcomed. You’re totally allowed to be chock full of zeal if your body has been impaled by a bus and you live to be one of the best painters of your generation, by the way.

Aaaaanway, let’s be honest: Thanksgiving is often a time where one of two things happen. Scenario one: you stay at home with your immediate family, swaddling your little ones, making excuses via text, hoping to God no one does a “pop by” with hot plate leftovers—you know, because the baby is sick. Scenario two: you get roped in—there is no escape. And there you are with what used to be Uncle Harold, who is now Aunt Helen (not that you’re judging at all, you just haven’t seen the new look). After your awkward, surfacey conversation about fall and winter boots, you move on to what you think is your dad’s new wife, but it’s just so hard to tell anymore. Naturally, her graduating class is two years after yours, but she’s dying to meet her new stepmom! YAY!!!

All of this could have been avoided, at least in part, if you had had a new conversation piece. A brilliant new painting hung behind the sofa, a large abstract on the kitchen accent wall, a Monet print in the dining room, whatever. But here’s the secret: the more complex and crazy the artwork, the more conversation you’ll create. In other words, yes, do order that to-scale reprint of Picasso’s Guernica and watch the water works go wild as you tell the story of how the Nazis stole it and oh, the inhumanity and, oop! What’s that? Dinner is served!

Naturally, for large artwork like we’re suggesting, you’ll want to use two Sexy Metal Hooks if it’s on a wire hanger, and if it has some other type of hanging hardware, simply visit our how to hang anything page and you’ll be set for the big day.

Yes, your vegan cousin Ron who changed his name to StarBright did bring a Tofurky. And yes, Thanksgiving almost always falls on your parents’ wedding anniversary, which means you’ll be regaled with hours of stories about their ceremony and honeymoon as you nearly pass out in your yams. But hey, Guernica: what a story man!